E30: Loneliness is becoming an increasing social problem. Discuss the possible causes and suggest some remedies.

Loneliness is not just a matter of being alone. The monk with his vow of silence may not feel lonely; the individual in an uncongenial group may feel very lonely indeed. So loneliness is a matter of the mind and spirit as well as the body. The richness of life lies in the companionship of a person with whom one has an emotional connection and perhaps a physical relationship, one who thinks in like terms and talks the same language. It is a person whose views on other people, the world in general, and God coincide. Unmarried people often find this in parents, so the loss of parents is perhaps unduly traumatic in their case.

The majority of people get married and find most of these outlets in the other person, if the marriage is happy. So bereavement, especially if untimely, is a prime cause of loneliness. Suddenly the house is empty, and there is nobody, even kind friends, children and relations, with whom one can quite communicate. The remedy? Time, and the determination to live the kind of life the other person would have hoped for. Remarriage? For some people, no doubt. Not for everybody. There is no real remedy for this kind of loneliness.

The fact is that widows and widowers, previously happily married, have a much increased lifespan nowadays. To have to live alone from say age sixty to ninety is no longer uncommon, and medical advance has to be counted as another prime cause of loneliness. It is not so long since people regarded survival beyond the age of fifty as a bonus. Today, the percentage of pensioners in Western communities is constantly rising. As an example, Greenwich in London (pop 11/2m) has 1/2m pensioners. So much social work, both municipal and private, has to be geared to the elderly, and much of it to the lonely elderly. This is why loneliness as a social problem is increasingly important. Very often the problem is exacerbated by extreme old age and sickness. To become housebound compounds the problem. Read the whole essay
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